Once I could see that Dhamma was really about conditions and anatta it was clear that Abhidhamma had that covered in detail. It was surprising to see how few could see that - a monk even said to me that Abhidhamma was not needed. And even teachers I listened to at first, ones who saw something in Abhidhamma, seemed to think sati was exempt from anatta- they thought focusing on an object indicated there was also sati.
It is clear that life and Abhidhamma is the same- what else could life be than nama and rupa. I was not interested in names and memorising lists, but I picked up vocabulary that related to what was here and now. So gradually my reading shifted to the Tipitaka and Commentaries. Nina van Gorkom was a great help as her writing includes suttanta and Abhidhamma (and some Vinaya). Now whether I am reading Jataka or the Patthana it is all about conditions and mentality-materiality. It is life and nature, explained with full accuracy.
I wrote in my book:
When not in Thailand I would send letters with questions to Nina and a few weeks later would receive her thoughtful and detailed handwritten replies. I also bought the complete English edition of the Tipiṭaka from the Pali Text Society for study and reference.
The days when Nina’s letters arrived were very meaningful and I would use them to reflect on the Dhamma she explained so well. Often I would drive into the forest, walk, sit, and consider what Nina had written. Sometimes I went to a large cemetery over 200 acres in size, to find a quiet place to sit and contemplate the insights Nina had shared. Many times we discussed passages like this from the Majjhima Nikāya 149:
The Great Sixfold Base: Bhikkhus, when one does not know and see the eye as it actually is, when one does not know and see forms as they actually are, when one does not know and see eye-consciousness as it actually is[…] one’s bodily and mental troubles increase, one’s bodily and mental torments increase, one’s bodily and mental fevers increase.
[…]
It should be noted that although the self is an illusion, there are still causes and effects and these are elucidated with great precision in the texts. It would be a grievous misinterpretation if we thought that anatta exempted us from the law of kamma. In fact the teaching on anatta and conditionality are intertwined, and so insight comes with knowledge that whatever is done, whether good or bad will bring its appropriate results.
[…]
In fact our coming into contact with Dhamma and our interest in it is all by conditions. Each life is truly its own, no two people are alike, because we have different accumulations from many lives, and we have made different kamma over many lives. What we share are fleeting moments of seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, touching, and thinking, each arising and falling away; simply dhammas, not a ‘self’. There is old kamma and new kamma. And all those in the past who attained were also on a long path.
From the Therigatha Commentary:
The Theri Sukkha heard the Buddha Vipassi. She gained faith, went forth, was one of great learning, expert in the doctrine and possessed of intelligence. Similarly at the time of the Blessed one Sikhi and the Blessed one Vessabhu she observed virtuous conduct and was one of great learning and one expert in the Dhamma. Similarly she went forth in the teaching of Kakusandha, Konagama and Kassapa Buddha’s, and she was one of pure virtuous conduct, one of great learning, and one who preached the Doctrine.. Commentary on the Verses of the Theris, Pali Text Society
In this Buddha era she went forth under Dhammadina and finally became arahat.
On the other hand, I did a full series with Ven. Maggavihāri at the International Institute of Theravāda, which covered most or all of the book, and a lot more than that, too, until I left in 2025. This included all the math and memorization of the lists and matrices.